Gabby Agbonlahor

Lazy prick. Loyal my arse, he just can't fit out of the door!

Mr Aston Villa. Don't you mean
Mr All you can eat for a tenna

Thats disgusting for a professional on apparantly more than 50k a week to be overweight

This has got disciplinary performance management of an under-performing employee written all over it. As has been mentioned on here before, employment law prevents instant dismissal in all professions/fields.
It doesn't matter how much of a worthless shitcunt the individual is unless they are dumb enough to commit an act of gross misconduct, you have to go through a series of stages to get them out.

In practice, most wasters are cunning enough to do just enough to keep themselves out of performance management procedures and aren't so dumb as to fuck up with a gross misconduct most of the time. However, people like that invariably slip up at some point because they are fuckos and get complacent. That's the point you hope your HR department is better than the global norm and your company's disciplinary procedures are drafted in such a way that you can actually start managing the scrote to the exit and not give grounds for a tribunal.

I know from experience that shitty procedures and HR twats can be a massive obstruction to dealing with assholes. However, you have to operate with what you have got and it seems to me the will is there to make life as uncomfortable as possible for this spastic. It's all you can do to try to force a knuckle or buckle - knuckle down and do the right thing or buckle under pressure and voluntarily fuck off and become someone else's problem.

I want the fat prick still in the squad and bought on at 90mins for the remaining games, I want him to hear the abuse! Fat fecking blimp.

I agree. I will be very disappointed if we don't get the chance to say our good byes to Mr Aston Villa.

On a similar note, will the players be doing a lap of dishonour after the Newcastle game?

CLICKY!!

GABBY SUSPENDED!!

What actually has he been suspended from?
Is it his 2 week fitness regime program, so he doesn't have to do it, bit like his football... arsehole!

We want Flabby out,
Flabby Gabby out,
We just don't think you understand.
From scoring at the Sty,
To feeling up a guy,
We want Flabby Gabby out.

Flabby Flabby Flabby Flabby Flabby Agbhonlahor, he's fat as fuck, he's fat as fuuu-uuu-ck

His contract needs to be terminated. What a waster...

the Agbonlahor news is distracting casual fans from the real news - King flinging his 'hit at the door of the owner Randy Lerner.

Maybe Gabby was given a new massive contract to be a distraction.

My alternative theory on why he was made club captain was that this was Sherwood's protest after not being allowed to sign the leader he wanted. "You won't let me sign a real leader? Okay, I'll make Gabby captain! Haha!"

Or maybe Gabby was made club captain to be a distraction to events higher up.

After all, letting Vlaar, Delph and Benteke go unreplaced over last summer, they were hardly going to expect good football to distract the fans.

Why does he need to take laughing gas anyway, surely the sight of his Villa contract should be enough to piss himself

I remember when I was learning to dive and they introduced us to the effects of Nitrogen Narcosis - the same kind of effect as sucking one on of those balloons except it's constant once you get below about 35 metres.

Two instructors went down with us because, even though you get a bit of head buzz and a brilliant feeling of euphoria, some people suffer the strange effect of feeling they can do just about anything.

One bloke ripped the reg out of his mouth and tried to swim off. Turned out he suddenly thought he could breathe underwater, didn't need all the shot on his back and he proceeded to swim off to be with his fellow fish!

Lucky for him, the two instructors were there to stop him dying.

So the obvious question here is, who can introduce Gabby to SCUBA diving and maybe just turn their back for a minute or two?

According to Telegraph Flabby Onegoalayear off to the sandpit for a middle eastern team, maybe we will even get a fee? People like the Qatari's are willing to pay a fortune to promote football ahead of the 2022 WC?

Hello!

That's interesting. Let me add 2 and 2 and get 47.

I remember learning to dive and being told about the narcs. I'm willing to drag Flabby down to 40 metres with you Trotts if you're game. The trouble is we'd need a lot of weight to get the fat git down these days

DelboyVilla wrote:According to Telegraph Flabby Onegoalayear off to the sandpit for a middle eastern team, maybe we will even get a fee? People like the Qatari's are willing to pay a fortune to promote football ahead of the 2022 WC?

That's the second time I've heard that. Where and when the first time was, I'm not sure exactly but it was after Dubaigate. I'm pretty sure it was one of those "I know someone who knows someone who knows Gabby and he is off to the ME at the end of the season." To steal a living from people with more money than sense at somewhere like Al Gharraffah.

I think the person mentioned something about it being connected with the house sale in Sutton/Little Aston or wherever he had his monument to overpaid crassness and poor taste built

I wouldn't like to think of him earning the millions a year they will probably pay the fucker but I'd like to think of him sucking money out of us even less.

http://www.birminghammail.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/aston-villa-striker-gabby-agbonlahors-11228868

Story about his Mum - there's a bit of an open goal in th about her having brain surgery, if anyone wants to slot that home - and how she misses him, watches him from the sidelines, etc.

Nice hairstyle!

Gabby working out! Just sayin!

Flabby has stood down from the captaincy and offered us all a grovelling apology. Apparently he's hurting too. Yeah right....

Just read that on the BBC site. What a joke!

https://t.co/Nw4mwYgtTH

"I'm so sorry and so disappointed that I'm giving my last 2 months salary back" he didn't say.

Actions not words Flabby

It will be impossible to unload gabby and he's contracted till 2018.

If you really do love this club my son, you've got nearly 4 months to get your arse into gear and be ready for the championship!

Prove the whole world wrong , earn your money and help get us back up, or if you love this club enough then make the ultimate sacrifice and cancel your contract and take no more monies from this great club.